


the father, the son, the choice

by dreamslikepaperlanterns



Category: The Mandalorian (TV)
Genre: Din Djarin Needs a Hug, Finding Purpose, Gen, Introspection, Not Beta Read, Post-Season/Series 02 Finale, someone give this man his baby back, there is no way din didn't have a breakdown, what happened after luke left
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-14 13:09:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28795932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamslikepaperlanterns/pseuds/dreamslikepaperlanterns
Summary: He had lost everything. His home, his people, his ship, his weapons, his creed, hisson. Grogu had become his whole world, his purpose in life and now he was gone and Din had been the one to send him away.After the elevator doors close, Din reflects on his grief and considers his future.
Relationships: Din Djarin & Grogu | Baby Yoda
Comments: 6
Kudos: 52





	the father, the son, the choice

The elevator doors hissed shut. 

Din felt the reassuring smile fall from his face, biting down hard on his lip to stop it from trembling. As the blinking lights showed the progress if the elevator, he felt his heart being squeezed tighter and tighter, an icy trickle of fear running down his back, the blaring alarm of _wrong wrong wrong_ looping in his mind. When the final light blinked off, he sucked in a ragged breath and slowly sank to his knees as his legs trembled and gave out. This was what he wanted, what his Armorer had told him to do, what he had been searching for and working toward for months. It was what Grogu needed. So why did he feel like a Dark Trooper had kicked him in the chest again? Grogu was so special, he deserved someone who could see that and show him how to use his powers. That someone wasn’t Din. He needed someone who could understand him, who could give him everything Din couldn’t. 

But what had he done? Din tried to fight down the rising panic in his chest, the feeling of wrongness threatening to overwhelm him. Behind him the others argued over what to do with Moff Gideon, but he didn’t care, could barely understand their words. Stale air from the vents blew in his bare face. His helmet sat abandoned just a foot to his right, but he couldn’t bring himself to put it on.

_You are as its father_

He had lost everything. His home, his people, his ship, his weapons, his creed, his son. He had lost his _son_. He had a fucking laser sword that apparently made him ruler of Mandalore, but he would gladly hurl it into space if it meant he could hold Grogu just one more time. 

_You’re like a father to him_

He covered his face with his hands. Tears dripped through his fingers. He didn’t deserve to wear the helmet again. He’d broken every single tenant of the Creed and for what? His son was gone. He was gone he was gone he was gonegonegone. Grogu had become his whole world, his purpose in life and now he was gone and Din had been the one to send him away. Distantly he could hear a faint wail, like a wounded bantha, and some far-off part of him wondered what was causing it before he realized that the sound was coming from him. 

What was he going to do? He wanted to run down to the landing dock and take back his kid, but he wouldn’t do that to Grogu, he wouldn’t. Grogu needed this, and Din would not be so selfish that he took away what was best for his kid. He wouldn’t. So why did he feel like he’d just made the biggest mistake of his life? Why did this hurt so much, feel so wrong? His shoulders shook and he bowed forward till his forehead brushed the floor, his head feeling fit to burst with the force of the sobs he was fighting to contain. He was a man adrift, his only anchor torn away. 

He didn’t realize that Dune had come up to him till she put a hand on his shoulder. Her touch was gentle, but he still flinched away. He didn’t deserve kindness, not now. 

“Hey,” Cara said softly, kneeling down just behind him. “Your boy is in good hands. That was Luke Skywalker, hero of the rebellion!” She said the name like it meant something. 

“He fought alongside the Princess of Alderaan to take down the Empire. They’ll never get their hands on him now.”

Her words were probably meant as a comfort, but all Din could do was shake with the sheer force of the grief that was threatening to choke him. 

There was a metallic _shing_ , and his helmet slid over to his knee. 

“We only saw the back of your head. You did right by your kid.” Cara lightly patted his shoulder and walked away. 

Din looked through his fingers at the blurry shape of his helmet. There was a choice before him. With a shaky hand, he reached out to the comfort of the helmet, wet gloves slipping against the smooth beskar. He lifted it into his lap, leaning his forehead against it, the metal cold against his hot skin. He wanted so badly to put it back on, but an equal part of him screamed that it was wrong, that it was too late, that he was _dar’manda_ now. Before he’d justified that removing it was necessary to save Grogu, but now… now he didn’t know what to think. He’d wanted Grogu to see him just once, to remember him, to know that he was loved. Was that selfish? Had he done it for himself or for Grogu? Din could still feel that tiny hand against his face, still saw those big eyes widening in recognition. 

_I’ll see you again, I promise_

He tightened his grip on the helmet. It wasn’t over yet. He’d promised his son that he would see him again, and he would find a way, move heaven and earth to do it if he had to. He’d made a deal to aid Bo-Katan in retaking Mandalore, a planet he supposedly ruled now, even though he’d never felt less Mandalorian. He would see through his end of the deal and then. Then he would find Grogu. If his training was complete, Din would take him back. If it wasn’t, he would stay with Grogu until it was, no matter how long it took, Jedi opinions on attachments be damned. He would find a ship, find them a home, maybe even find his people again. He would do it all for his son. 

_He means more to me than you will ever know_

Din had made his choice. 

He slid on his helmet.

He would do whatever it took, fight whoever stood in his way, all so that he could get his family back and keep them safe. 

What could be more Mandalorian than that?

**Author's Note:**

> Come scream with me on [tumblr](https://dreamslikepaperlanterns.tumblr.com/) about a space dad and his weird son!


End file.
